Funny Retirement Wishes: Retirement is the time for relaxation, but leaving the favorite workplace and going through daily routine changes can be frightening. While retiring, people are sure to feel nostalgic. So Due to the lack of motivation, they often feel low-spirited too. Do you know someone who has just retired and wants to lighten their mood with funny retirement wishes? happy wishing for retirement quotes, message for colleague So There is no better way to do that than sending the person some funny retirement messages. Below, find out some funny retirement quotes and messages to wish the retiree a happy and fun-filled retired life.

Funny Retirement Quotes

etirement is one of those major life milestones that mark the ending of one chapter and the start of another. Similarly Trading in long hours at the office for never-ending days of playing golf, traveling, or playing with the grandchildren is something that most people look forward to as they approach the end of their career. However, leaving the workplace behind can also be a bittersweet time for a retiree as feelings of excitement and trepidation mix together as they look back upon the memories of their career while facing the endless possibilities ahead of them.

If someone you know is retiring, sending them a happy retirement card is a simple way to congratulate them on a successful career and wish them well on the exciting adventures ahead. Adding heartfelt good wishes and quotes to a store-bought card is a surefire way to make your retirement message even more memorable!

• “When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking.” – Gail Sheehy
• “Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.” – Jonathan Clements
• “Retired people compliment my teeth, then tell me to take care of them. This always makes me think they are trying to steal them.” – Emily Claire Tamblyn

• “When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.” – R C Sherriff

• “Retirement can be a great joy if you can figure out how to spend time without spending money.” – Author Unknown

• “People are always asking me when I’m going to retire. Why should I? I’ve got it two ways. I’m still making movies, and I’m a senior citizen, so I can see myself at half price.” – George Burns
• “The concept of freedom is never truly realized until one settles into retirement mode.” – A. Major
• “Retirement is wonderful. It’s doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it.” – Gene Perret
• “We spend our lives on the run: we get up by the clock, eat and sleep by the clock, get up again, go to work – and then we retire. And what do they give us? A bloody clock.” – Dave Allen
• “When you retire, you switch bosses — from the one who hired you to the one who married you.” – Gene Perret

• “A gold watch is the most appropriate gift for retirement as its recipients have given up so many of their golden hours in a lifetime of service.” – Harry Mahtar
• “First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly.” – Branch Rickey
• “Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous, When I was sixty-five – I still had pimples.” – George Burns

Retirement Funny Wishes

Retirement is a big step in everyone’s life. One’s life completely changes after this step. So if you have a retiree at your family or workplace, send them your love along with some touches of humor. Here, we offer you some funny retirement goodbye messages that will surely make the receiver roll with laughter.

Please read them and get ideas on what funny things to write in a retirement card for a friend, family member, co-worker, or even a boss! The best part is, these messages can be given to anyone, regardless of their profession or gender. So wish them a happy retirement with some jokes and a little bit of personal touch, and they will remember your words forever.

• Before you’d have to wait for holidays, now the rest of your life is one! Do enjoy it.
• Retirement is like graduation- only this time, you will do a masters on laziness!
• Seeing your performance over the years you’ve worked, I’m sure that you’ll be very good at doing nothing!

• For someone who looks forward to lay around all day, retirement must be thrilling! Have fun.
• Now you’re rich and fat, what can be a perfect time for retiring? You’ve chosen the right path!

• Now you get a new boss who knows about your true work ethic, organizational skills, and excuses. Spouses make the toughest bosses. Good luck!

• It doesn’t matter whether you behave like a grumpy retiree or not, because people are going to assume that anyways. Good luck dealing with that.

• Congratulations for your retirement. Now you will be forced to work on a never-ending project that will take up all your time and it’s called – Doing Nothing.
• Health, family, friends and relationships are some of the things that you sacrificed in your life so that you could work harder and earn more money. Now you will realize that you need these things to enjoy retirement. Such is the irony of life.
• No matter how many college degrees, skill development courses and professional accreditation’s you have received, there is one more qualification you will still receive after your retirement – Master of Doing Nothing. Congratulations.

Funny Retirement Messages For Colleague

• When people say that this place will not be the same without you, they actually mean that it will be less annoying.
• You’re retiring now? I thought you did it the day you joined here. I mean, when did you ever work?
• If this workplace were a hell, which it is, you’d be one of the greatest devils of it, and you’ll be missed.
• People who call sloths the laziest animals surely have never met you. You were born to retire, buddy.
• Don’t let everyone’s loving words fool you; I’m the only one in the office who is going to miss you.

Funny Retirement Messages For Coworkers

• I used to be excited about retirement until I saw you. God forbid that I become as grumpy as you!
• This is the only time when everyone at the office will be looking up to you. Who doesn’t want to get out of this place!
• Ah retirement, the days of daydreaming and sleeping till noon, all the things you’re good at!
• I’m jealous that every day of the week will be the weekend for you. After that Have a good life ahead!
• Congratulations on leaving the job and not getting fired after missing so many deadlines!

Retirement Funny Messages For Boss

• Who said bosses have to be scary? Seeing you, I’ve come to believe that bosses are not only scary but also frightful!
• Your retirement hurts me; not because you’re leaving, but because of the worry that what if the next boss also happens to be like you?
• Secondly I’ve always been more excited about your retirement than my own, and you can obviously guess why!
• We will miss you, boss, other than your screaming, glowering, and pretty much showing up at the office.
• You’re done bossing us, now you can do it around your grandkids and pets; because bossing is in your blood.

Funny Retirement Messages For Husband

• Dear husband, congratulations on your new-found freedom! keep calm and have fun.
• Happy retirement, love. And if you ever miss your workplace, wishing happy retirement I can be your boss, for free!
• Now that you’re done with your other job, you can go back to your main job- annoying me 24/7.
• Finally, you’ve retired, and you cannot give the excuse of work anymore. Marriage is going to be great again!
• Thank God, now I have a new 24/7 assistant at my home! Happy retirement to my life long helper.
• Happy retirement hubby. I’m happier on your retirement than you. At least you have no excuse to make time for me.

Funny Retirement Messages For a Friend

• I know a lazy guy like you deserves an early retirement! Congrats on your well-deserved leisure.
• Welcome to the old man club. wishing happy retirement It’s time to gossip about joint pain, high bp, sugar level, and Et cetera Et cetera.
• If life is a meal, retirement is its dessert. To enjoy it, stay fit, and don’t let your blood sugar go high!
• Congratulations to a lazy-bone like you for completing work-life! Finally, you can go back to being your true self.
• I wanted to wish you a fun retirement. But with this old fat body, I don’t see any fun coming towards you.
• Every day of your retired life will feel like a happy Friday night. But it’s useless because being old will make you feel dull like Monday morning all the time. Happy retirement.
• All these years you argued with your colleagues, juniors, managers and your boss at work. After retirement, you will argue with your grand-kids, children and wife at home. Life remains the same.

• As I see it you have been practicing how to retire and now the real thing is here. You are so good at it that there should be no problem taking up your new role. Have a happy retirement.
• Happy retirement and my advice is that you do not try to say that you are coming back because you will be surprised at people’s reactions. No one will give back your office, nor your parking space. No one misses you that much.

Retirement Wishes to Write in Retirement Cards

• Retirement is the world’s longest coffee break. Enjoy your coffee!
• Your someday is here. Enjoy!
• Enjoy your days of sleeping late and doing nothing! retirement message for colleague But All the best on your retirement.
• I hope that your retired life is the best part of your life.
• Happy Retirement! So Enjoy the rest and relaxation!

• Enjoy a long-overdue retirement. Now you can enjoy all the finer things in life.
• Enjoy your retirement. wishing happy retirement And enjoy all of the exciting adventures ahead of you!
• Now the fun begins! Happy retirement.
• You got your life back! Enjoy every minute of your retirement.
• Just because you’re retired doesn’t mean you stop taking coffee breaks. Be sure to schedule me in!
• Didn’t you only just start yesterday? Happy Retirement, friend!

• I hope retirement brings you the chance to do whatever it is that you always wanted to do but didn’t get to. All the best!

• I am a little jealous, to be honest! Enjoy your retirement!
• Congratulations on your retirement! Wishing you the best of health, wishes for retirement happiness, and success on your new journey in life.
• Best wishes as you retire. Congratulations on the next phase of your life.
• Have a restful but fun and active retirement! happy wishing for retirement quotes, message for colleague

• You’ve reached the finish line! Enjoy your retirement and your next adventures.
• The fun finally begins! Congratulations on your retirement. retirement message for colleague
• You’ve been promoted to the retirement stage of your life! Congrats!
• Retirement isn’t really all that great as it sounds. No pressure from the boss, zero deadlines, no company meetings to enjoy—how will you manage?
• Happy Retirement! You’ll never have to ask for a day off ever again!
• You have been great to work with and I will never forget all you taught me along the way. You are a great role model! Enjoy your retirement.
• Kick back and enjoy—you don’t have to punch a clock anymore! Happy retirement!